It’s probably too early for this, but what the fuck right? This douche, Heath Ledger, offs himself with sleeping pills after filming the newest Batman movie. Honestly, how can you go from being in probably one of the bigger blockbuster films of the upcoming year to killing yourself? Now, don’t tell me that the pressure got to him or some other retarded bullshit. It comes down to the simple fact that he was a weak ass pussy and Darwinian Law tore his shit up. Now, you’re probably wondering why Darwin’s Theory of Evolution pushed his shit in. Well, I won’t just give you one reason. I’ll give you ten!
#10 Who Cares?
Okay, now who read the news of his “untimely passing” and really cared? If you did, was your first thought “Gee, I hope they finished filming Batman.”? Exactly! Nobody cares that Heath died. He’s a B-List actor who’s been in a ton of shitty movies and was lucky enough to play the Joker in the upcoming Batman flick.
#9 He's Australian
Not to mention that he’s a “bloody Australian”. What in the hell have the Australian’s ever done for mankind. Well, besides for being in shitty movies and pretending to be bad asses. Have you ever noticed that their most famous recognizable landmark is a damn theater? How damn manly is that? It’s pretty queer if you ask me.
#8 Made $3million from A Knight's Tale
Speaking of shitty movies, did you know that Heath actually made $3 million dollars for that extremely shitty movie, A Knight’s Tale? Now, I can see where a kind of bad movie brings in a few bucks, but for a movie as bad as A Knight’s Tale to bring in any money is just beyond me. So this douche nozzle brings in $3 million and then off’s himself? Talk about kissing a gift horse in the mouth.
#7 Jack Nicholson
I’m sure this will upset quite a few of you too young to remember good movies, but Jack Nicholson is the ONE TRUE JOKER! I’ve seen a lot of reviews talking about how good Heath looks in the new movie, but that just can’t be right. The special effects may be bigger and better in the upcoming movie, but there is no way that Heath can play a crazy ass dude as well as Nicholson. Plus, don’t give Heath credit for the upcoming Joker being envisioned as the KILLER JOKER. That has nothing to do with Heath, he just reads the lines.
#6 His name is Heath
His name was Heath. Hell, if my parents had named me Heath, I would have done myself in straight out of the womb. No self-respecting guy can have a name like that. You might as well name yourself bitch and get permanent knee-pads installed.
#5 Brokeback Mountain
Speaking of knee-pads, he was one of the main actors in the OVERTLY FUCKING GAY film, Brokeback Mountain. Now, I’m not trying to be hateful towards butt-fucking faggots or anything. But, for this dude to star in a movie that encourages little kids to go home and anally rape their friends just isn’t right.
#4 Sweat
I’m probably kicking a dead horse on this, but he ALSO played a gay dude in a tv series called Sweat. It’s pretty funny that the majority of roles he gets is to play gay dudes. The show's name is Sweat. You know something is wrong with a name like that. Do you think that’s telling us something about his true personality? The guy was a flaming homo-sexual and deserved to die. Hell, his wife didn’t even want him, so why should we?
#3 10 Things I Hate About You
He was in 10 Things I Hate About You. I don’t even want to get into how bad this movie was. It would just piss me off more. Sure you may say that atleast he didn’t playing a Fudge Pirate in this movie. But, I beg to differ. No heterosexual male would sing while dancing on the bleacher at a school. Singing is for the birds and fags.
#2 He's a Spitter
Supposedly, he’s got a nasty habit of spitting. I’m not just talking about spitting up whatever love juice that his current boyfriend has spilled into his gullet. He’s been accused numerous times of spitting on paparazzi. Again, you could try to say I’m wrong and that he always claimed his innocence. But, it’s got to be true if his ex-wife says that it really did happen. Why would she lie? It’s not like she was getting any boning from him anyway?
#1 His Fans
Why else do I think that he deserved to die? Because, his fans are the epitome of fucking retards. Too many of them enjoyed his movies and helped make the public think that it was okay to reach for nuts in a tent while corn holing your fishing buddy. Fishing is a time honored tradition between men, and his fans helped ruin it for any dude that’s now too afraid to go fishing with another dude.
You may think that I’m going overboard here, but check out this hoser. HOSER LINK . His article on the ten things he hate’s about heath ledger’s death has #10 as “I'm going to cry even harder next time I watch Brokeback”. Thank god Ledger fucking killed himself. Otherwise we’d have to go through life dealing with emo-bitches like CampBlood’s author, campbloodbuzz.
Conclusion
I for one am happy that Heath finally decided to end all of our pain and suffering of having to watch his movies. The paparazzi can now go back to work without worrying about being spat on. And gay dudes can go back in their damn closet, so that I don’t have too see any more shows dedicated to their gayness. Here’s a quote from IMDB which I found pretty funny. "Heath has had such a wide variety of roles that he seems unsure what to do with himself next." Ha, it’s pretty obvious now what he had planned to do with himself next.
List of Shitty Heath Ledger Movies
Brokeback Mountain (Widescreen Edition)
Brokeback Mountain [HD DVD]The Brothers Grimm [Blu-ray]
The Brothers GrimmLords of Dogtown (Unrated Extended Cut)
A Knight's Tale (Special Edition)
A Knight's Tale [Blu-ray]The Patriot (Special Edition)
The Patriot (Extended Cut) [Blu-ray]
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